Typical mistakes in the upbringing of teenagers that we make and don’t even notice it

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The usual story: a child left a table and did not say ‘thank you’. He was given a box of chocolates, but he didn’t even think that he could share it with his parents.

After coming from school, he grumbled something muffled under his breath and locked himself in his room. All these tiny and, at first thought, unimportant details grow like a rolling snowball. And here we can see a teenager who is constantly forgetting to congratulate his mother on her birthday. Or here is a girl who marries the first comer in order to move in with him quickly. Not to speak of extreme, irreparable situations. As we know, the reasons for some actions of an adult person can originate from childhood. It is not that someone is guilty or not. Going back to basics, child’s behavior and character develop in an environment, created by his parents and their actions. After all, no matter which way you look at it, an adult person is both older and, as defined, smarter. Thus, here are a few invisible mistakes that parents make and don’t even know their consequences:

1. Don’t ever try yo give your children all the most valuable things.

That’s how parents often express their desire to compensate for their own childhood. We want to give childen the things that we were deprived of. We want to make OUR dreams come true with the help of children.

If you think, that everything will come right in a head of your chils at one particular moment, then you are wrong. A child perceives everything that happens to him as a common thing. He simply has nothing to compare.

What happens in his reality? At this moment, parents become more like source of goods, rather than loving parents and closest people of a child.

2. Do not hope that when children grow up, they will be able to appreciate what you have done for them.

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This is an amazing phenomenon of children’s perception. If you do not teach your child generosity, respect, sense of duty and gratitude to parents, the child is unlikely to be able to learn it on his own, while being absorbed with his tablet or riding a skateboard. After all, the continuity of generations isn’t just about ‘Respect your mother!’ or ‘Give your grandma a chair!’. It occurs through behaviour assessment of a child and dealing with situations where he has shown disrespect.

It is a joint communication, not lectures(!!) on the topic of respect. It is behavior of parents itself, which children comprehend and copy, reflexively imitating it. Or they try their best to resist this manner of communication, which is, generally speaking, the same thing.

3. Never be pitiful to children.

If you think that your child is little and does not understand anything – it’s an illusion. From the very beginning, children understand boundaries very clearly and constantly try to expand them. At the same time, they manage to adjust themselves to adults, showing themselves in the most favorable light. If patents understand it and are able to get theit own way firmly and calmly, then a child would ‘play by the rules’. And parents will be able to cultivate necessary qualities of their child.

And one more for the road.

Raising a child is not a single day process, it can’t be neglected. Otherwise, the character of a child may be based on leftovers and take the road of least resistance.

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